Today I went to see my endocrinologist (a doctor specialized in hormones) and we talked about how my hormone therapy is going. He showed me the test result and apparently I have already more or less the same levels of estrogen as a born female. For some strange reason it felt good to hear that, like some kind of scientifc evidence that my body is really changing the way I want. I have felt good about the small changes I have seen during the past months and this confirmed that. My skin is a little bit softer, my sex drive is considerably lower (which feels good), have a noticable breast development, my facial features seem a little bit softer and I kind of think the veins seem to be a little less visible.
Today was my first session of speech therapy (logoped på svenska). No matter how you put it – the voice is important for us. It is a significant part of how we are and we all relate to voices. Even though I think I do not have voice that is way too dark, it is still very much an issue for me. Maybe not so much in face-to-face meetings but I really don’t like using the phone sometimes. It is so hard when someone on the other end just assume you are not a woman. And sometimes it is not possible to do anything about it like in the morning…
Recently, I have been using a lot of audio-chat software as well and it is the same thing there, especially when talking to people I have never met before. It felt much better to text chat only in the beginning. Anyway, the aim of this therapy is to make me use my existing voice as good as possibly and also doing that in a way that does not harm it. So she made me do some excercises today where the aim was to make me aware of my breathing and how to properly use the stomach area when speaking. I imagine it is not that far away from taking singing lessons 🙂 I think I did rather good and it was interesting to find out (again) that I can take rather high tones and still being powerful. In the end we did another recording to profile my voice as a reference. Looking forward to the next time.
Well, on Saturday I returned home to Sweden again, after almost a month in the US. I should have been updating the blog more but I got a few days of stomach unrest so the margins kind of vanished. I will try to backlog a few moments and picture later. It is good to be back again even though I already miss the warm weather we had during the last weekend. The trip home was tough as always, for some strange reason going back to Sweden is always more tiresome than going to the US. We also missed our connecting flight to Stockholm so I got back home a few hours later than planned as well.
On the flight home I also tried surfing onboard the Aircraft using Connexion by Boeing. It took a while before it started but when it did I got a few hundred kilobits of transfer speed while being 11 000 m (30000 ft) above Greenland 🙂 Should have remembered to update my blog there but my battery run out of power after a while.
This evening we went to a restaurant called Outback (Australian-themed of course) on the Norfolk side of the water. First we tried their wide assortment of (big) steaks which was ok…I guess I am not into that immense amount of meat in one piece. After that some of use felt a craving for something sweet so we called for the waiter. Two of us have settled for a dessert called “Chocolate Chocolate Tower” and we had joked about how big it could be. Anyway, one of them ordered one of these and the waiter said “ok, thanks” and started walking away…the other one at hour table started smiling and said (a little bit hesitantly) “oh…I want one too”…the waiter looked a bit surprised, turned back and said “ok” and made a note in his notepad. By then, we should have realised that one was probably more than enough for all four of us 😉 It when it arrived it was BIG…I think we left half of each dessert even though we actually tried eating a lot…well not me…but two of the others 🙂